Check this out.

Super cool invisible streetlights by Jongoh Lee:

Happy New Year.

New Year's Resolutions:

1. Be more positive.
I used to be extremely optimistic as a youth, however I've realized that this is no longer the case. Instead, I'm almost the exact opposite (i.e. extremely cynical)--and it depresses me. I suppose the optimism was a product of naivete, however I would have liked to have kept a bit of it. Optism not cynicism!

2. Be more outspoken.
Depending on who I'm with I can be extremely tactless. While I realize my behaviour can be hurtful, I only am this way with them because I know they can handle it. And that's why I love them and want to spend time with them. It makes me uncomfortable and distressed when I am in a situation where my expressivity (word?) is hindered because people are too 'weak' to handle the truth as I see it. Therefore, this year I'm going to try to think less about how people will react and more about what I want to say (and how I want to say it...basically less sugar-coating things).

3. NO MORE BUYING CLOTHES!

Book update.

I'm well into Malcolm Gladwell's book, Outliers, (the one I mentioned previously) and I must say that it is simply amazing (just as how I predicited it would be). As I read, I find myself admiring people who use the English language the most efficiently and competently. Gladwell is simply one of those people. Sigh. If only I could get my ideas across as effectively as he can.

If you read any book this year than make it this one. Or atleast read Chapter 7.

Edit: All of Gladwell's books are SO MUCH BETTER THAN Freakonomics, which in my opinion¹ was a poorly written, arrogant attempt at "exploring the hidden side of everthing" that resulted in the authors exploring absolutely nothing at all. One of the main reasons why I severely dislike this book is because its ego-centric tone. It would have been tolerable had the writing been good and if the examples they give had actually been used to prove their points--however neither was the case in this book. I do hypothesize, however, that Gladwell either 1) didn't read Freakonomics, 2) was misquoted or 3) lied, because he is quoted as saying "Prepare to be dazzled" on the front of Freakonomics. (Considering the unyielding hype surrounding Freakonomics, there must be some value in the fact that Gladwell was quoted on the cover. He truly is the man when it comes to explanatory non-fiction).

¹ My opinion is based on the first 4 of the 6 chapters of the book. I had to force myself to read past the first 2...and gave up after the 4th. I'll finish reading it eventually.

So good.

Another dreamhouse.

Binimelis House

Designed by Polidura + Talhouk Arquitectos

Photo: trendir.com

This really love the natural feel of this house despite its modern design. The stone, glass, and wood..sigh.

I think that the reason why I have such low tolerance for a lot of people is that I expect people to treat me the same way I treat them. And when that does not happen, I get annoyed and dislike them..if only for a moment. I don't always treat people with the respect that they deserve. However, while it may seem that I am tactless at times, I do withhold a lot of comments. I realize now that I am really conscious about what I say...

...and for stairs.

Photo cred: Apartment Therapy

I have a thing for beautiful bath fixtures...specifically sinks.

All pics from freshome.com

The first sink uses the used water to feed the plant that grows out if it.

MERRY MERRY CHRISTMAS!

I love Christmas.

I think you really get a good description of people based on how they spend their Christmases:

Even though it means blasting Abba in my room in order to drown out the Filipinos singing Christmas carols with a karaoke machine downstairs, Christmas is my favorite time of year.

This year, my parents prepared a sirloin in my mom's new 'Nuwave' oven that she spontaneously bought after watching an infomercial. I was skeptical, however it was really tender, so it was a good purchase.

Usually (meaning practically every Christmas since my birth), I don't leave the house on this day. BUT I really want to watch the Darjeeling Limited...so I'm hoping my dad will drive me to Blockbuster...which is OPEN 365 days a year! Along with the North York YMCA lol. I wish Michael's was open all the time--I need to buy acrylics.

About 3 hours later:
So I just finished watching Lars and the Real Girl. Blockbuster didn't have Darjeeling. I'm going to watch A Good Year next. I'm hoping for the post-'Under the Tuscan Sun' feeling.

Fun facts.

Did you know that the plural of cherub is cherubs AND cherubims.

Like how the plural of seraph is seraphim.

New blog.

Change is going to come.

In all of my bitterness about having to work today and tomorrow and the next, I'd still like to mention:

I love this time of year not only because of the chestnuts roasting on an open fire, Jack Frost nipping on your nose, Yuletide carols being sung by a choir, and folks dressed up like Eskimos; but because its that time when everyone takes the time to clear their busy schedules to meet with the people they love. And even though its one of the most hectic and stressful times of year, everyone wants to make the most of it and enjoy themselves...because unfortunately, its pretty much the only time of the year when life for almost everyone (atleast on the Western hemisphere) slows down a bit. I love this feeling in the air right now. And even though today I was the bitchiest (excuse my language), its only instantaneous in the grand scheme of things. I'm really content right now.



You know that fleeting feeling that you get when you initially feel relieved? When your body relaxes completely and for that one second you're so comfortable, it sort of stuns you?

GAH.

Today started out well, became the worst, and then ended happily. Let me explain:
I woke up today thinking that, because I gave my shift away at work, I would be able to do all of the wonderful things I had planned to do--go to Mandarin, stuff my face, go to Indigo, buy a book, go to the ROM potluck, stuff my face, go to J's, stuff my face, drink wine, go home, and read Breaking Dawn (Twilight in disguise). I got dressed, baubled around the house for a bit, and then made my way to Yonge and Eglinton to meet up with fellow UofT science nerds.

There's a life science learning forum that the organizers of BIO150 (1st year bio) set up a few years ago--its a really popular website that all life science students can use (not JUST lifescis, but mainly, since it is for sciencers). Theres the expected course forums where students and profs (b/c a lot of them use it too) can post/answer questions, an announcement board for events, course union profiles, prof profiles, etc--the list goes on. Aside from the school stuff, there's also a general chat where everyone can talk about anything and everything under the sun. Like I said, its pretty popular. So today, like at the end of every semester, the people of Biome (that's its name...it's pretty clever if you get the ecology speak) get together for a Biome social...basically where everyone comes out from behind their computers and their screen names and actually show themselves to the people they've been talking online to for months but don't actually know. A lot of EEBUers are mods on Biome, so last night after the EEBU movie night they invited me along...even though I'm barely on Biome. It's really intense! And addicting! Once you post about something, you can't stop. There is really a thread for EVERY SUBJECT IMAGINABLE. Gossip Girl, check. Twilight, check. High School Musical, check. White supremacy, check. EVERYTHING. Anyhoo, I'm not an intense Biomer like everyone else, but I went anyway because its fun to meet new people, hang out with people you like, and eat like a pig at a buffet.

JUST as I'm about to go into the subway, the girl who I gave my shift to, texts me this message, "Hey K, just reminding you of your shift today." WTF??!!?!?!?!!??ifdjpafidjapfdj;afkj!?!?!?@!?!??!?!?jfi;ajfdkjaf;d!?! WTF?? GAH. So I obvi text her back, "Um...remember I gave it to you..????". Anyway, long text message story short: She's stupid.

Another long story short: After getting fed up with her stupidity, I cut my lunch short (good thing I guess since I didn't eat too much? Blah, who am I kidding? Its Mandarin); and went to work. At work, however, I was the most mean. I got there and I explained the whole situation to my manager, including the part about her being stupid. He laughed, but I think he now thinks she's stupid too, so hopefully I won't have to deal with her for much longer. Here's a play by play of our convo after I angrily explained to him what went on:

MJ the manager: [Looking at the schedule] So what do you want to do today?
Me: Other than go home? Or drink wine at my friend's Christmas party?
MJ: Uh...
Me: Stab Princess in the eye. (Note: the girl's name is Princess...no words.)
MJ: ........So you'll just fold clothes then?

GAH. Anyhoo, everyone knew I was mad, so they pretty much let me do whatever I wanted...which was nothing. I think I stood around talking to someone for like half an hour and no one said anything. I think they realized that without me they would have been screwed since most of the people working today are new and therefore don't know anything yet. And its not like I didn't get shit done. I totally closed down half the women's section by myself and then I had to go fix everyone else's sections b/c they didn't do a good job. And afterwards, MJ was like "I'm going upstairs...you make sure they finish down here.." And then he left. And then the power trip began (jks..sort of). But ya, I better get a raise.

So after work, which ended at like 11pm, I phoned J to see how the party went, etc, etc. Unfortunately, it was over. But fortunately there were still are leftovers! So I went over to J's for literally a midnight snack..well, more like a meal. Sigh. Just thinking about brie, olives, avocado, and Nutella makes me happy. And since the stupid blue line 25 comes like every hour, she drove me home. Bless her soul. And now I'm in my bed, blogging. I would read Breaking Dawn, but I'll save it for tomorrow.

I love blogging!

And I love that a couple of you do too!





Start blogging. It's fun.

Question.

How does someone even accumulate 30 pairs of jeans?!?!

Sea of clothes.

So a couple of days ago the grand idea of removing every article of clothing from my closet and reorganizing everything popped into my head. Two days later I can safely say that since I'm still putting things back, it was a bad idea. That said, one good idea has come out of the black hole for clothes (i.e. my bedroom)--a clothing swap! What do you guys think? Have stuff you don't want? In my case, it would be a give-a-way rather than a swap since I don't need anything. If there's interest, let me know! It could be fun...and cleansing.

Rough.

So last night was staff party part deux.
:O
Really, these people are insane. INSANE.

And now, since the blog is private, I can post pictures. With commentary.

Another movie.

I would also like to mention that I'd like to see The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.

What a wonderful world.

Happy happy happy happy weekend!
Friday was the best. An early (maybe too early?..sorry guys!) leisurely brunch/breakfast. Lots of laughs. Great group of people. It all came together so wonderfully. Sigh. Ha, I love how the seating plan worked out naturally. (Isn't it weird, the things I worry about?). After brunch, myself and a few others wandered around and did a bit of shopping. Eventually only JL and I were left. We were supposed to go dancing, but the fact that the day started out really early dampened those plans...too tired. Instead we rented a movie (Evening, with Meryl Streep, Claire Danes, Vanessa Redgrave, Glenn Close, Hugh Dancy, Patrick Wilson, the list goes on! Seriously, such a good movie. Go rent it now!), ordered some pizza and just chilled chez moi. An enjoyable ending to a great day.
Yesterday, work was looong. We're open for extended holiday hours now, so we closed at 10 instead of 8 :O. Pretty enjoyable though, it was a good group working.
And today is the staff party! Yay!
I wish I had something more exciting to talk write about.

WOOT

2 out of 3 are DONE!!!!!!!!
Now, if only I could finish the 3 papers I have due.

Aside from that, I'm excited about this weekend...which is starting early! I obviously don't have to mention how content I feel about tomorrow's plans, so I'll skip it. Saturday might be okay, depending on how busy work is (I unfortunately have to work from like 1-11 :S). Hopefully I don't have to work on Sunday...if I do though, the day should still be good because UO's staff Christmas party is being held that night. From what I heard about the last staff party (which I didn't go to because of the paper and test I had the next day) this one is sure to be wild. But of course, what staff party wouldn't be wild when you put doing-drugs-in-the-bathroom-at-work managers together with literally-starving-artists (they're all so thin...I just want to feed them) and hipsters-from-the-boonies in Baby Hueys. Aka the smallest bar possible. Sometimes I wonder where I fit in the UO mix. Other times, I try really hard not to think about it. We'll see what happens Sunday.

Dolls' dreamhouses.

"The House at Jardin del Sol"

Designed by Corona y P. Amaral Arquitectos

Photo: Busyboo

"Fallingwater"

Designed by Frank Lloyd Wright

Photo: Google

T-minus 9 hours till my next exam...

I should be studying.
I feel like sleeping.
I might be dreaming.

A minor flaw...

I realize I am being extremely judgemental when I say this: I find it difficult to take people without a science background who are passionate about the environment/climate change/ecology/sustainability seriously; no matter how passionate they are. I really don't trust their judgement, especially when it comes to policy making. Not that they're always wrong. I guess I've taken up that whole 'science-exclusivity-mindset'...which is how the whole problem I explained in a previous post started.

I realize that I am being very judgemental. I am trying to overcome this.

HOWEVER, in order to save the environment one needs to understand the processes behind it and how it works to the best of their ability (I say this because we don't know everything about nature and never will). How can one make decisions about the environment if one doesn't understand carrying capacities, the role of fires in ecosystems, ecophagy, conflicts in species concepts, etc.?

Feel free to argue with me on this one, but how can someone with a BA in political studies be Canada's Minister of the Environment?

LOOK AT THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Or actually, watch it on the website for the full effect.

AHHHHHH!!! Totally CANNOT wait for this. Its like the BBC was made to document the Earth. Check out the website for more goodies: http://www.loveearth.com/us/film. Its not narrated by David, though...Patrick Stewart should be able to fill his shoes okay. I really hope this comes to theatres here...specifically Imax. Could you imagine?! I'd probably experience vertigo watching that opening scene.

Because there are too many words.

Check out this kitchen. The black walls are phenomenal, albeit the risk factor.

Photo: hgtv.com

An epiphany of sorts.

So below is what should of been a blog post that I instead sent to a couple friends. I copy and pasted. I'm too lazy to go through it all and actually use proper grammar, spelling, and capital letters, so bear with it.

"so i just had an epiphany and i'd like to share it with you. (i know eh, perfect timing...the worst time of the year to go through a 'turnaround')over the past few weeks i've come to the realization that i'm in the wrong field. not that ecology isn't something that im passionate about. but that im not a 'scientist.' i need to do something with my life that is more creative...and that has a larger scope. ecology and evolution are yes, extremely important, but at the same time extremely specific and thus, only a few people actually get into it. studying ecology the past few years has made me realize that humans have everything at their fingertips to save the enviro, however those tools are usually limited to only scientists. im not saying that science is to blame. what im saying is that there is a HUGE gap in knowledge between the science world and the general public. and its not because the science words are too technical, or b/c the technology is extremely advanced...its because there arent that many people doing a good job at bridging the gap between the two 'worlds'.
a prof once told me a story about how he was being interviewed by a reporter from the star about invasive species in the great lakes. he thought that he could cite his opinion and whatever; that the reporter would know something about the subject. however, as he soon found out, this so-called environmental reporter didn't have a clue about invasive species. INVASIVE SPECIES!!!! one of the most basic things ever, and this person had no idea what the term even meant.my prof was so shocked and upset...and it wasnt his job to explain the entire thing to the reporter; so he didnt finish the interview. i believe he hung up.
but anyway, im not trying to blame the reporter or anything. what i think the above story shows is how the two sides need to work together because we're on one side.thats where my epiphany comes in. doing a phd in ecology is too specific, too focused...theres no integration with the rest of society.thus, i've decided to go into environmental design or journalism. (leaning towards environmental design at the moment...being an architect would be so cool). i think journalism probably involves more learning; however creating harmony between nature and one's own living/working/etc spaces is extremely important. my fave building at u of t (im not sure if you guys have seen it or not..if you havent ill have to show you sometime) is this building which has one entire wall made of glass. and so when you look into it, you can see every floor, etc. the cool think about it, is that there are trees growing inside the building, even though there arent many trees outside. its like bringing nature in. the concept is soooo cool. "

Soooo yah.

A lazy Sunday disguised as a Wednesday.

Today was unproductive (seems to be a trend these days), although quite pleasant. Met up with JH and ZY for some breakfast at Flo's. We were there for literally three hours. Conversing, laughing (e.g. Merlin), crosswording and even a bit of drawing (ha). After a stop at Pusateri's to look at cheese, we went to Indigo. YAY! I wanted to buy a copy of Paris Vogue, but they didn't have it! Disappointing; they had like every other foreign Vogue (India, included), but not the one I wanted. Oh well. Next time. Summary: We ate. We browsed. We went home.

Right now I'm writing a mini paper on conservation issues and fisheries ecology. Summary: There is no solution. Unfortunately.

Tomorrow will most likely suck. I have class from 9-4 and then work from 5-10ish. :( Summary: show me something sparkly.

Winter projects.

I've decided to paint my room over the break.

I'm going to go with a beige/aubergine/black theme. All of the walls will be beige except for one feature aubergine wall. That said, I don't know which wall to paint aubergine!

A tempest in my mind.

I've had a lot on my mind lately.
Yesterday, while taking the bus home from work, I experienced the worst bout of motion sickness ever. I didn't throw up (thank God!) but I felt light-headed, dizzy, and just all around terrible. I'm wondering if it was actually motion sickness, or perhaps, just the motions of getting sick. I tend to be one of those people whose physical state of being is closely linked to their emotional state. When I think clearly, or am happy, I FEEL happy. When I feel confused, anxious, or uneasy, I get sick. I think thats what's happening now.

Even though I tried really hard not to think of the 'future', I couldn't help myself. In terms of school, I'm miserable. As much as I love the three E's: ecology, evolution, and the environment; I've realized this year that I don't want to engage myself in it for the rest of my life. I'm having difficulty coming to terms with the fact that what I've spent almost the past 4 years studying is not, like I previously thought, what I plan on doing with my life. I've realized in the past few months that I definitely need to engage myself in a more creative, visual field. But what?! I could see myself in fashion, but like I was discussing with a friend this morning at work, the 'scene' and the people within it are too much to handle. They don't seem real. And that's what I want, you know. I want to feel alive, but in this world. Not in some fantasy, dreamland that only exists at night and where the only aspiration people have is to be surrounded by the flashing lights of paparazzi. It's too surreal. Surreality, in my mind, is great--within limitations. I think the fashion industry, while it has its major, completely inspiring players, is surrounded in a mist of dense fog in which all of the minor players get lost in. (I'm running on a Shakespeare analogy right now: "All the world's a stage..." -As you like it, Act2Scene7). Too many people want to do fashion. And quite frankly, its not even about fashion, per se. Its more about style...I think I'm ranting now, so I'll stop. But ya--lots on my mind.

I hate days like today. BUT tomorrow is Dec 1st.

So I'm officially in "welcome winter" mode. Good thing too, since theres a storm brewing outside. I'm also in "YAY Christmas" mode....and I have been for the past year. Christmas can come early at any time of the year.

Anyhoo, today sucked not because of the weather, but because it was so utterly, fruitlessly, and unbearably unproductive. UGH. Usually, if I'm not doing something I HAVE TO do (i.e. school), I do something I WANT TO do (i.e. some form of happy procrastination...like reading Twilight. More on that later). Today, however, I did neither! I went to the library, typed up some data into Excel, tried to figure out how to approach a paper I have due, and then sat for 2 hours hating life because I had no coffee in me. Seriously, it was a struggle: should I leave my stuff and go get coffee, or should I just take it all with me, or should I just go home? I ended up walking to Starbucks in the rain (with all of my stuff), where I ordered the most yuppie-ish and delicious thing ever: a grande, no-foam, soy, extra-hot (i.e. scalding) caramel latte. Ha, the other day during my break at work, (this is a story tangent; will continue about my day after) the woman in front of me at Starbucks ordered something so yuppie-ish that the barista was like "whoa," and then I ordered the above drink, after which he was like, "today is so challeging, I like it."

Back to today. After Starbucks I decided to walk to Indigo to pass the time since I had to meet some friends and there wasn't enough time to walk all the way back to the library (and study). I was planning on doing some readings, but then I got distracted by the giant display devoted to TWILIGHT. Since I've recently developed an addiction to the books, I couldn't resist and started to read. Twilight, let me tell you, is so addictive. I used to make fun of a co-worker because she would read the books during her breaks. I now understand her obsession, and I complete regret making fun of her. The writing isn't particularly good, but the storyline is. It reels you in.

Unfortunately, I didn't have enough time to finish the book in one sitting (I would have, too, had I had a few more hours), because a couple of girls from work and I were getting together to watch GG. Made the trek to UO to pick up DV and meet RB, and then walked to DV's. Her apartment is the nicest. Seriously, an Audrey-themed, beautiful pad. So jeal. Anyway, we made nachos and drank cocktails and watched GG. A pleasant way to end a terrible day. And GG was sooooo good today!

Now I'm home, all snuggly (GREAT WORD) listening to Mariah Carey's Christmas album, i.e. THE Christmas album. So a good way to end the day. And tomorrow is DECEMBER!! My favourite month despite the hell that is school!

You know you love an author when...

...you LITERALLY GASP at the sight of one of their new books. Seriously, I actually gasped out loud in Indigo. I walked to the bookstore mecca between classes today to purchase a gift card for JT, the professor of my dreams. (He's presenting a talk entitled "Bee Brains and Pollen Grains" for EEBU's fall academic seminar this afternoon. I was in charge of getting him an honorarium). As I was slowly making my way to the cash desk, I quickly skimmed the titles on the "New Hot Non-Fiction" shelves. About half way down the bookcase I spotted the name Gladwell; and the info I gathered from the subsequent double-take caused my heart to skip a beat. MALCOLM GLADWELL HAS A NEW BOOK!!!! Click on the picture of the book for more info:Even though I didn't read the synopsis..or pretty much any of the text on the cover of the book other than the title and his name, and even though I have no money, I knew I had to have it needed it. So I bought it with the last remaining funds I had. From what I gather, its about success...? Whatever, I'm sure that it'll be one of my favourite books regardless of what its about. (Yes, I have THAT much faith in Gladwell). I unfortunately have to save reading it until after my last exam; so for now I will place it on a pedestal in my room so that I can glance up at it every time I feel the despair building in my chest during the continuously tedious study sessions that are going to be in abundance within the next few weeks. In the words of Charlie the Unicorn's friends, it will bring me "sweets and joy and joyness."

For fun. And because I already need a break from writing. Even though I've only been here for an hour.

While I do think its futile, I do enjoy reading my horoscope from time to time. I've decided to share it with you all today, courtesy of astrology.com.

"Your energy feels a little odd today, especially when it comes to social matters -- in fact, you may just want to be left alone! You're thinking about some heavy issues, so maybe it's all for the best."

Hmmm..kind of true, kind of not--just like EVERY horoscope. It depends on which way you spin it.
Let's see what they have to say about Sagittarius in general:

"Sagittarius is symbolized by the Archer. You're impulsive and inquisitive, needing travel and constant exposure to new foods, people, landscapes and things to do. Change is one thing you can't do without; you are a truth-seeker, and will go to the ends of the earth to find answers!"

What do you think? Sound like me?

New gig.

So I have exciting news: I'm going to be a writer for a campus fashion journal/magazine! I think it'll be fun. Definitely a welcome change from the misery that is science writing. Anyhoo, we'll see where it takes me.

In other news: Can you believe that December is NEXT WEEK?!?!!!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?! WHERE DID NOVEMBER GO?!?!!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! WTF?!!!!
I'm obviously in denial. School is almost over, a million causes for celebration are coming up (my birthday included..), and FEB is like 2 months away (Feb = BARBADOS!). You must be wondering then, why are you in denial? Shouldn't you be happy that time is flying by? Well, in fact, no. HALF THE YEAR IS OVER. And with the year's end comes the pending question, "What am I doing with my life?!" (Seriously, though, what am I doing?). Sigh. Too many questions and so little time. Or should I say a lot of time; its just not going slow enough.

Pratt, comme d'habitude

Once again, I've found myself on a cold, blistering Sunday in Pratt; on my computer, writing a paper. Or in this case, trying to understand the data that I'm writing this paper on.

This 'weekend' was rather enjoyable. On Wednesday night I went to JH's school choir's version of Faust. Obviously in French. I surprisingly understood a lot of it. Hooray! Not all is lost. That said, I'm going through a French phase...once again. I really want to go to France. Summer? Thursday was blah, but on Friday a group of us went to karaoke for ES' birthday celebration. SO MUCH FUN. SOOOO MUCH FUN. I had to work from 8-4 yesterday, and afterwards I wandered around the mall with CB while she searched for presents. And today (and tonight) I'm here.

Snowflakes are falling on my head.

In practically the course of a few hours it went from being breezy, beautiful autumn to a winter wonderland. "Blarghz," I say! It totally caught me off guard, and now I'm sad about it. As much as I like snow, the half a foot of it thats on the ground (and the two extra feet of it we'll probably get in the next month or so) means that instead of wearing these: I'm wearing these for the next four months:

Woe is me!

I need to move someplace where fall is long and theres rarely snow. Any ideas?

unorganized-ness: worst feeling in the world

I've been feeling so unorganized these past few days; I don't know what to do. I admit that I'm a bit rough around the edges, and usually never more than an organized mess..however, right now I feel like all control is lost. And I hate it. With the impending truck-loads of work due in the next couple of weeks, I'm panicking. And I hate how I don't know what happened...it was only a few weeks ago when I was on top of school work--ahead, even.

I'm not going to say that its due to this blog. I think its done me good.
Part of it, I think, is my lack of motivation.
But how can I be motivated when I don't even know what I'm striving for?? What is it that I'm trying to achieve? I don't have a clue. I'm having trouble focusing on what I'm doing right now since I don't know what comes next. And its not that I need to see whats years ahead of me; I know that it doesn't matter right now. Its just that I've always believed that I was on the right path...and that no matter what happened, it would all work out. But right now I'm questioning it. It feels like I'm going in the wrong direction. I need to stop and focus.

Hocus pocus.

Focus.

Focus.

Update: Quantum of Solace

SOOOOOOOOO GOOD!

Rain, rain go away.

I usually don't mind rain, but I must say, this weather sucks.

That said, it is the perfect day to be holed up in Pratt...a la Julia Stiles' character in The Prince and Me lol. And if I recall, it was raining on the day she was studying in this library as well. Coincidence? No. This library is my study place of choice...mainly because it has my lighting of choice. I'm sooo affected by lighting. If the lighting isn't optimal, then I can't study. I'm not the only one, right? For example, the reason why I can't study in Robarts, other than the fact that it feels like a jail, is because of the lighting. Its not that it isn't bright (its almost like being in the dentist's chair at times); its just so unnatural...and the wall-to-wall cherry red carpet does not help it to be less so.

Pratt, on the other hand, is so light and airy. Its like studying outside, inside. And I mean, look at the view:

Dear John Baird,

My Ecology seminar is soooooo good. Probably the best class I've ever taken at UofT...and I've taken some pretty awesome classes (recall 1-week 'course' in Panama; various courses involving fishing, animal-seeking, and swimming, aka accidental fall into river/ocean/stream).

I just love how its almost 'anything goes'. For example, on Thursday, we started the class with a discussion on Prochilodus, a genus of detrital-eating fish found in South America. Prochilodus is an important genus in the ecosystem because of its ability to harvest nutrients from sediments when other fish cannot. It not only plays a large role in the food web, but also it has an important role as an ecosystem engineer (i.e. it physically alters the environment). However Prochilodus is being over-fished in S.A. because of its large size and therefore its numbers are declining. In class on Thursday we discussed the implications of losing this genus from the environment....and this in turn led to a discussion on conservation. Which led to a conversation on politics...then to the economy...until one point, one of my classmates said, "So we're not talking about ecology anymore," and my prof responded, "You noticed?! This is the type of conversation we should be having over beer." Ha, so now we're all going out for beer before exams to talk about everything we're not supposed to talk about in class. But back to the subject: this class rocks.

And its not just because its so small. I think what it boils down to is the fact that we're all learning from each other--not just being told something by the prof. Everyone in the class is so knowledgeable/passionate about Ecology and when we have discussions, they're actually meaningful and worthwhile. Discussions in this class actually give me hope. We all know we can save the environment, but only in this class, have I felt like we will.

John Baird, you really need to come to class.

I've been in Makeup 101 for the past 7 years.

There are only a few stores that can hold my attention span long enough for me to completely lose track of time and cause me to get distracted by everything in sight. One of these stores is Sephora.

As someone who rarely uses makeup, Sephora, at first didn't attract me. When the first one opened in Toronto, I cringed at the thought of going in it because, "the smell will give me a headache." Time passed, and somehow I managed to become immune to the scent that I now know and love. With my new immunity came curiosity, and eventually I ventured into, what I shall call, the beauty black hole.

Seriously, everytime I go into Sephora I stay there for what seems like hours. They have everything!!! And the people who work there are so helpful and nice. And it smells good. And its colorful. And you can try everything. And get samples. Sigh.

Update: AND they give you free stuff for your birthday!

All the excitement you could ever need; in 2 hours.

The new James Bond flick comes out tomorrow!!!!!!!! YAY! Ha, I surprisingly can't find a friend to go see it with, so my dad said that he'd take me.

Get ready for this!

Good nights mean good mornings.

Last night, I went out with OH to Sneaks after a meeting at school. I was shocked to learn that she had never been to Sneaks before. Its like a Toronto institution in my mind. Nevertheless, it was a jolly old time. (Note: add jolly to 'good word' list. Alongside 'plump' and all palindromes).

Also, check out some of the awesome pics from Vogue's feature on the designers competing for the CFDA/Vogue Fashion Fund Award. So pretty!

A floral suit!!

Medicine

Cooties.

I'm getting sick. And its making me feel tired and frustrated.
Go away influenza, go away.

Summertime.

Even though its November I'm already thinking about what the summer will bring. I want to travel to a far off land...but where? One option is to just pick a place and go. No school, no tours...just my backpack and I. Although that is definitely something I've always dreamed of doing (and I suppose, I did get a taste of this out east a couple of summers ago), I'm not sure if I actually want to do it this summer. And to be honest, I'm not sure I even want to do an ecology/outdoorsy related trip either. As much as I love animals and the environment, I want to meet people next summer, and experience a new culture. France is sounding like a good option right now. I am considering doing a summer abroad course through school. That way, I can brush up on my french, gain another credit that can be used towards a french teachable and then have the option to travel before/after the course.

I really hope I go somewhere.

I'm getting restless.

On a less serious note:

Pics of the day:

America has voted for change.

I was actually moved to tears by Obama's speech presence last night. I've never been one to feel passionate about politics, so this kind of shocked me. I think what really got to me was watching this whole thing with my dad. For most of the night, he kept saying rhetorically, "Can you believe it? Can you believe it!?!?!" And when Obama came onto the stage, the look on my dad's face was priceless/unforgettable/ingrained in my memory forever.

I don't really care much for the concept of race, however tonight, I feel particularly inclined to discuss it. I'll be honest with you, I hate the concept of race. I don't hate very many things, so this is a big deal. For years its been a word that I've always attached negative associations with. Why does it matter that your skin is black/white/yellow/red/brown/etc.? Why does it matter that you and a whole other bunch of people are different from others based on common, genetically linked, physical characteristics?? Didn't we all come from the same ancestor anyway?
Well, yes, yes we did.

But even though we are the same species, and we all came from one common ancestor, the fact that a (half-)black man was elected president of the United States is still BIG news. I guess for me, its not that big of a deal. I got over the concept of race being a dividing factor practically at birth when I probabaly looked up at my parents, saw that they weren't the same colour, and thought that that was normal. To my dad, however, as I learned from his reaction tonight, it is a big deal. Which is why I cried.

As some of you know, my parents' families didn't agree to the union between my mom and dad because my dad is black and my mom is asian. And to be honest with you, I sometimes get the hint that they don't still agree with it. Even after all of these years. (And this really hurts me, seeing as how I'm the product of said union.)

And as some of you may not know, my dad used to be a pharmacist back in Trinidad. When he immigrated to Canada, he went into a pharmacy to try to get an apprenticeship with the pharmacist while he went to school. The white man looked at my dad's black skin and said that he'd never be a pharmacist and that he couldn't give him a job. And with that, my dad became a chef.

If my dad had the example of a black US president back then, I think that things may have turned out differently for him. And that's why Obama in the White House is such a good thing. For all those kids out there who think the odds are against them, they now have the perfect role model.

And with this, I leave you with a cute quote by (apparently) Jay-Z:
"Rosa Parks sat so that Martin Luther King could walk. Martin Luther King walked, so that Obama could run. Obama is running so that we all can fly."

Glued to the television.

Right now, I'm sitting in my living room with my parents watching the U.S. Presidential Election. It's so exciting! After almost two years of campaigning, it all comes down to tonight.

Looks like Obama will win. Obama just won.

And, in light of this fact, I will state something I never in my life have ever thought I would ever state:

I wish I was an American tonight.

I hope that in the near future (as in, four years from now), someone will run in a Canadian election who will make me feel this way about our country. But as I wait out the next four years wishing I could flee south of the border, and although I feel like Canadians have taken a step back by voting conservatively again, I'll remember that for the past 141 years Canada has only taken steps forward. We've always been ahead, and its now its time to let the others catch up.

Things I like besides my friends:

Rejoice!

I'm feeling quite good right now. My behaviour lab report is now due next Monday...as opposed to this Wednesday and I just had a good conversation with a friend who I had been thinking about this weekend.

I had been thinking about a few good friends this past weekend; however they're all relatively difficult to get a hold of (ie. don't live in this city/country/continent; don't have a phone; aren't home for the weekend; are moving; etc.) so I didn't get to talk with them. I was feeling quite bummed about that--you know that feeling that you get when you have exciting news and you call your friend to tell them excitedly the exciting news only to get a busy tone or have them not pick up? Well, that's sort of what I was feeling...Until today! I spoke to OH about her weekend jaunt to Montreal, to JH about the move to her new place, and I also heard from AS, whose past time of watching Harry Potter clips on Youtube I find amusing.

I like my friends.

Swamped.

I have so much school work to do! Not to mention that I am the slowest essay writer ever. I'm a pretty good writer, it just takes me a million years to formulate the perfect paragraph. Which I suppose is the problem--I'm too meticulous when it comes to paper-writing. Nonetheless, kind of regretting going out last night. It was still amusing though. EP knows what I mean lol.

And finally, a vow of sorts: I promise this blog will not turn into one of those cliched fashion blogs.

It may, however, turn into 'Project Document-All-That-I-Like-and-Think-is-Beautiful.'

To get the ball rolling:

(Add this bathing suit to the previous Christmas wishlist.)

Last night's party

The Halloween shindig chez MB and WK was enjoyable. Its always good to get together with friends you don't see often. As always, drama ensued and thus made the party less enjoyable for some.

Work today was rough. Twas soooo busy. I can't imagine what the holidays will be like.

Speaking of the holidays, is it wierd that I want to put up the tree already? Is the first week of November too early? (Don't answer that.) I'm so very excited for December!

My unrealistic Christmas wishlist:

Yes, that's right, I want the Eiffel tower for Christmas.

Please read this Santa.

Have a happy Saturday!

Happy Halloween!

YAY for such wonderful weather on such a wonderful day.

My attempt at being either a flower or a snail for Halloween failed. Hence, easy ballerina costume it is. But whatever, I look cute.

I hope you all have a wonderful night/weekend/life.

Ta-da

Emerald
1. A brilliant green to grass-green transparent variety of beryl, highly valued as a gem.
2. A strong yellowish green.
2. A favourite of mine.

Persuasion
1. The act of persuading.
2. The power to persuade.
3. A strongly held opinion; a conviction.
4. A novel by Jane Austen.
5. A favourite of mine.

I've decided to start a blog. Not that I need anything else to distract me from a) school and b) things that already distract me from school, but I figure it'll be good anyway. I will use this blog to a) practice my writing and as b) another way to express my feelings/thoughts/ideas (since I don't do that often enough) and also as c) a place to put the multitude of alphabetically ordered lists I've generated.

Don't be alarmed if I write about you. In fact, get used to it because I probably will.

And let me know what you think. Because I'll definitely let you know what I'm thinking here.